So hot out here
March 28, 2009
During the month of June and July. Here in the panhandle it got pretty hot in this area. In Fact people were even overworking in the heat. So one day I was working outside in the heat and then i thought i better get inside. My Boss asked me where i was going and i told him i am going inside to cool down. He said that i better get back to work. I said i cant, he said how come.? Because it is so hot out here that i have to go inside to change my mind.
Group of senior citizens were exchanging notes
March 28, 2009
A group of senior citizens were exchanging notes about their ailments. “My arm is so weak I can hardly hold this coffee cup.”
“Yes, I know. My cataracts are so bad I cant see to pour the coffee.”
“I cant turn my head because of the arthritis in my neck.”
“My blood pressure pills make my dizzy.” “I guess that’s the price we pay for getting old.”
“Well, its not all bad. We should be thankful that we can still drive.”
Incoming Joke Comedy search:
Who likes music?
March 28, 2009
Who likes music? – asks a commander.
Two soldiers step forward.
All right. I bought a piano. Take it to my apartment on the fourth floor.
Charged with drunk driving
March 28, 2009
A red-faced judge convened court after a long lunch. The first case involved a man charged with drunk driving who claimed it simply wasn’t true.
“I’m as sober as you are, your honor,” the man claimed. The judge replied, “Clerk, please enter a guilty plea. The defendant is sentenced to 30 days.”
Appointment with the dentist
March 28, 2009
“I came in to make an appointment with the dentist.” said the man to the receptionist. “I’m sorry sir.” she replied. “Hes out right now, but…”
“Thank you,” interrupted the obviously nervous prospective patient. “When will he be out again?”
Incoming Joke Comedy search:
A man was walking along a beach
March 28, 2009
A man was walking along a beach and stumbled across an old lamp. He picked it up, rubbed it and out popped a genie. The genie said “You released me from the lamp, blah blah blah. This is the fourth time this month and I’m getting a little sick of these wishes so you can forget about three. You only get one wish!”
The man sat and thought about it for a while and said, “Ive always wanted to go to Hawaii but I’m scared to fly and I get very seasick. “Could you build me a bridge to Hawaii so I can drive over there to visit?”
The genie laughed and said, “That’s impossible! Think of the logistics of that! How would the supports ever reach the bottom of the Pacific? Think of how much concrete! How much steel! You’re going to have to think of another wish.” Read more
Catholic Priest VS Rabbi
March 28, 2009
A Catholic Priest and a Rabbi were chatting one day when the conversation turned to a discussion of job descriptions and promotion. “What do you have to look forward to in way of a promotion in your job?” asked the Rabbi. “Well, I’m next in line for the Monsignors job.” replied the Priest.
“Yes, and then what?” asked the Rabbi. “Well, next I can become Arch-Bishop.” said the Priest. “Yes, and then?” asked the Rabbi.
“If I work real hard and do a good job as Arch-Bishop, its possible for me to become a full Bishop.” said the Priest.”O.K., then what?” asked the Rabbi.The Priest, begining to get a bit exasperated replied, “With some luck and real hard work, maybe I can become a Cardinal.”
“And then?” asked the Rabbi. Read more
Incoming Joke Comedy search:
If Elected I promise…
March 27, 2009
A little girl asked her father, “Daddy? Do all Fairy Tales begin with Once Upon A Time?” And he replied, “No, there is a whole series of Fairy Tales that begin with If Elected I promise…”
